Post by serenityterasaur on Jun 12, 2010 5:15:41 GMT -5
(((Warning: If you cannot handle tough subjects such as miscarriages, please refrain from reading this post...Thank You!)))
It was late, that much she knew, though how late she couldn’t tell…the digital clock on the bedside table blinked midnight over and over as they tended to do when the electric had flickered just long enough for all of the clocks in the house to be turned off. It was storming. Serenity slid out of the warmth and security of her bed, their bed, white blue gaze staring down at the sleeping form of her mate…the father of her unborn child. If only she knew what would be happening…she would have stayed asleep, would have been blissfully unaware of the turn her life was about to take. She stood on tiptoes to stare out of the high window in her bedroom, the night shirt she wore sliding up tanned thighs as she peered out into the night, watching with slight fascination as a storm raged, lightning flashing, thunder rolling through town. She turned and snatched up her iPhone, searching for the real time…one thirty-four in the morning. Sheesh. She’d only been asleep two hours and now she was wide awake. Her left hand slid down to caress the small bump below her navel as she was prone to do several, no, hundreds of times a day. She’d been about to slide back into bed when she heard a miserable retching sound echoing from the shared bathroom on their floor. Rhage. Ser frowned and slipped through the door of her room, shutting it soundlessly behind her as she padded barefooted to the open bathroom door. Sure enough her twin was on her knees on the cold linoleum floor, identical platinum blond locks pulled to one shoulder as she threw up the remainder of the meal the three of them had shared this evening.
“Sissy?” Ser murmured as she moved into the room, nose wrinkling at the sickly sweet smell that seemed to hover around a room after someone has recently gotten sick. Rhage didn’t answer, Ser didn’t blame her. There was a thin sheen of sweat sliding down her sister’s face, her body wracking with dry heaves now. Ugh. The joys of pregnancy. Ser moved to the hall closet deftly grabbing a clean black wash cloth, one of Gage’s, then headed back to the bathroom where she proceeded to wet it down with cool water, mopping the sweat off of her sister’s face gently. They did this for another twenty minutes or so, Rhage heaving, Ser mopping, her beasts floating around the small room soothingly to help her twin. Eventually Rhage had nothing left, and she collapsed against her twin. Ser would hold her close, wiping up the sweat and anything else she needed to. She flushed the toilet and got her twin hoisted up enough so that she could brush her teeth and gargle with some mouth wash…she was too weak to stand on her own. Ser maneuvered Rhage into Bliss and Narci’s old room, she’d not make the mistake of putting her in Rhage’s own room again until they painted it…got it away from that clinical look. Once Rhage was tucked in Ser loped down the staircase to the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water and some crackers to settle her twin’s stomach, though when she returned to the room Rhage was sound asleep. She smiled softly, setting the water and crackers on the bedside table before lifting a hand to run it across her twin’s slightly bigger belly, twins…Ser would never have believed it. She was so happy for her sister, for herself…it seemed like even with the recent disturbances from the clinic, their lives were beginning to move forward. She pulled the cover over her sister, kissed her forehead and made her way back to her own room…tired enough to sleep now she thought.
The panwere slid back into her room silently, shutting the door behind her once again and tiptoeing to the bed. She had just slid beneath the cool sheets when the mutters began. Glacier gaze would slide to her mate’s face as his head shook back and forth as if caught in a nightmare, she frowned leaning closer to him to hear what he was murmuring…”Can’t kill…must….she’s just a child!....Yes Sir….so much blood…so young…” Ser sat back with widened eyes, hand moving to cover her mouth as it trembled, little silver butterfly lip ring causing indents in her flesh from the pressure. What was he talking about? The mumbling continued…”Serenity…my angel….kill…Terasaur?...Rhage…Bliss…” His head shook again, a pained look on his face, “I can’t…no…I won’t! Angel!.....debts…must kill…Terasaurs….all…” Ser’s body shook, gasps escaping her from each name, each word that left his mouth. She didn’t understand…was so confused. “I’ll do it….I’ll kill them…all of them…” He murmured as he rolled over, arm coiling about her lithe frame making her jump and slip to the floor, landing hard on her bottom as she crab walked backwards, scrambling away from him as far as she could get until her back hit the opposite wall. Jared was paying debts by killing….and he was hired to kill the Terasaurs. The thoughts, the words echoed in her head…it wasn’t true…couldn’t be….but she had heard what he said! Her mind refused to believe it….”I’m sorry….so sorry…forgive me….Angel…no choice…” Jared’s words broke on a sob…he was crying in his sleep. Guilty men talked in their sleep….the words flickered through her mind, words her father had spoken in her youth.
Ser scrambled out of the room on hands and knees until she reached the stairs where she slid down, didn’t bother to stand, just leaned against the railing and pulled herself down until her bare feet hit the hardwood flooring of the entry way. She fumbled with the locks on the side kitchen door, finally managing to throw the dead bolt and open the door enough to slide out…she barely shut it before she took off running. Where would she go? She didn’t know…she just ran. It never occurred to her that it was still storming and she was outside in nothing but an oversized t-shirt that fell to her hips...nothing on below it. By time she reached the forest the shirt clung to her every curve, her hair lay in lank pieces around her face, feet were cut up and bleeding from the rocks, gravel, and even a piece of glass she’d stepped on but had ignored…she just kept running. The forest was dark, spooky…but Ser felt alive…her body trembling from more than just the cold and rain that fell down in blankets so thick she could barely see a foot in front of her as she moved. Her mind was whirling with the things he said…she knew his past…she never thought his future and the debts he’d be paying were those of a hit man…and he was to kill her family…her. The pain that shot through her was so raw and sharp that it brought her to her knees. Sticks snapped, leaves stuck to her body as she kneeled on the muddy ground, hands in front of her, body shaking. She panted, trying to stay in control…she couldn’t lose it…though she was having problems remembering why.
His words kept echoing over and over in her mind as her body twisted, contorted. She screamed. It echoed in the forest but a particularly loud crash of thunder drowned it out….disguised the sounds of her unwanted shifting from anything that could possibly hear her at the moment. She was utterly alone. Her body shook with force as bones reshaped themselves to something she’d never been…face contorted as she continued to scream…a muzzle grew…goo slid across her body and exploded outwards coating nearby plants and vegetation as coarse tan-ish blonde fur spread over her skin…a slightly darker color than her normal…she looked…like Jared did when he was a wolf. The snarl that over took her was canine as she fought the change, body elongated and shifting to yet another form. It was sleeker, thinner, bigger. Her fur receded then came back a lighter more platinum blond. She was lion. The stench of blood and other bodily fluids would be overwhelming as she lay panting on the ground, pain slicing through her abdomen causing the massive cat to hiss and mewl and roar. She’d lost the baby.
Some hours later she awoke…the sun had not yet begun to rise, and Jared’s face was close to her’s. “Angel?! What happened?! Why are you out here?” He knew…but he had to ask. He knew she had shifted. Ser’s white blue orbs widened, a look of sheer hatred and pain flickering through them as she scrambled away from him across the muddy leaf strewn grown. “Don’t. Touch. Me.” She muttered through clenched teeth when he reached for her again, worried, scared. “Baby…its me…what happened?” He asked softly as the scent of blood overtook his senses, her blood…it was the scent of the end of their child’s life. “You happened.” She snarled, causing him to wince, “You are nothing but a killer…a cold hearted murderer…how could you? A little girl…innocent people?” She screamed at him and ranted at him as he just stood there, each word she yelled acting like a precise hit to his stomach, his heart, his sanity. “I….didn’t have a choice…I owed debts...the girl...Oh God...Pakistan...” His voice was soft, sad,…regretful, she focused on the first part, ignored the last in her anger, “Debts?! DEBTS?! You killed innocent people to clear your fucking debts! And now…now you have to kill my family…me…..how could you agree to it?! I thought you loved me…” Her voice broke; the look on his face was utter confusion, “What are you talking about Angel?” He moved towards her, warily, the look in her normally white blue orbs now pure white scared him to his core….this wasn’t his Serenity. “I’m not your Angel! Don’t act like you don’t know…don’t lie to me! Get away from me….don’t touch me…no more….get out of here…get out of the Pride House…I don’t want anything to do with you ever again….if you come near me or my sisters…I’ll kill you myself before you kill them.” She snarled the words with such hate, such loathing that it cut through him, broke him. The look on his face, so forlorn…rejected…pain filled. It wormed it’s way into her heart, but she ignored it….her last words were what finished it all…”You are just like my Father…like Ulric….I hate you.” The words hung heavily between them as he stared at her, trembling on the muddy ground naked, coiled in a tight ball, knees to her chest. He left then…just…walked away…to where she’d never know. All she knew was that she began to cry, bawl, coiled into that sad little ball on the ground, shivering from the cold and rain. She stayed there for God knows how long and cried until there was nothing left…until Rhage found her and forced her home.
Ser wouldn’t talk, she made no noises, she just stayed curled up naked, dirty, wet on her bed, staring at the wall. Nothing her twin tried worked, a doctor came and went…most likely from the Master’s personal payroll…Rhage would have had to ask them for help. Ser refused to eat, to sleep, to talk…anything…she just…laid there…a statue, her grief filling the room. When it overcame her and became too much she shifted, first wolf then lion…then hours later would shift back…an endless cycle.
It was late, that much she knew, though how late she couldn’t tell…the digital clock on the bedside table blinked midnight over and over as they tended to do when the electric had flickered just long enough for all of the clocks in the house to be turned off. It was storming. Serenity slid out of the warmth and security of her bed, their bed, white blue gaze staring down at the sleeping form of her mate…the father of her unborn child. If only she knew what would be happening…she would have stayed asleep, would have been blissfully unaware of the turn her life was about to take. She stood on tiptoes to stare out of the high window in her bedroom, the night shirt she wore sliding up tanned thighs as she peered out into the night, watching with slight fascination as a storm raged, lightning flashing, thunder rolling through town. She turned and snatched up her iPhone, searching for the real time…one thirty-four in the morning. Sheesh. She’d only been asleep two hours and now she was wide awake. Her left hand slid down to caress the small bump below her navel as she was prone to do several, no, hundreds of times a day. She’d been about to slide back into bed when she heard a miserable retching sound echoing from the shared bathroom on their floor. Rhage. Ser frowned and slipped through the door of her room, shutting it soundlessly behind her as she padded barefooted to the open bathroom door. Sure enough her twin was on her knees on the cold linoleum floor, identical platinum blond locks pulled to one shoulder as she threw up the remainder of the meal the three of them had shared this evening.
“Sissy?” Ser murmured as she moved into the room, nose wrinkling at the sickly sweet smell that seemed to hover around a room after someone has recently gotten sick. Rhage didn’t answer, Ser didn’t blame her. There was a thin sheen of sweat sliding down her sister’s face, her body wracking with dry heaves now. Ugh. The joys of pregnancy. Ser moved to the hall closet deftly grabbing a clean black wash cloth, one of Gage’s, then headed back to the bathroom where she proceeded to wet it down with cool water, mopping the sweat off of her sister’s face gently. They did this for another twenty minutes or so, Rhage heaving, Ser mopping, her beasts floating around the small room soothingly to help her twin. Eventually Rhage had nothing left, and she collapsed against her twin. Ser would hold her close, wiping up the sweat and anything else she needed to. She flushed the toilet and got her twin hoisted up enough so that she could brush her teeth and gargle with some mouth wash…she was too weak to stand on her own. Ser maneuvered Rhage into Bliss and Narci’s old room, she’d not make the mistake of putting her in Rhage’s own room again until they painted it…got it away from that clinical look. Once Rhage was tucked in Ser loped down the staircase to the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water and some crackers to settle her twin’s stomach, though when she returned to the room Rhage was sound asleep. She smiled softly, setting the water and crackers on the bedside table before lifting a hand to run it across her twin’s slightly bigger belly, twins…Ser would never have believed it. She was so happy for her sister, for herself…it seemed like even with the recent disturbances from the clinic, their lives were beginning to move forward. She pulled the cover over her sister, kissed her forehead and made her way back to her own room…tired enough to sleep now she thought.
The panwere slid back into her room silently, shutting the door behind her once again and tiptoeing to the bed. She had just slid beneath the cool sheets when the mutters began. Glacier gaze would slide to her mate’s face as his head shook back and forth as if caught in a nightmare, she frowned leaning closer to him to hear what he was murmuring…”Can’t kill…must….she’s just a child!....Yes Sir….so much blood…so young…” Ser sat back with widened eyes, hand moving to cover her mouth as it trembled, little silver butterfly lip ring causing indents in her flesh from the pressure. What was he talking about? The mumbling continued…”Serenity…my angel….kill…Terasaur?...Rhage…Bliss…” His head shook again, a pained look on his face, “I can’t…no…I won’t! Angel!.....debts…must kill…Terasaurs….all…” Ser’s body shook, gasps escaping her from each name, each word that left his mouth. She didn’t understand…was so confused. “I’ll do it….I’ll kill them…all of them…” He murmured as he rolled over, arm coiling about her lithe frame making her jump and slip to the floor, landing hard on her bottom as she crab walked backwards, scrambling away from him as far as she could get until her back hit the opposite wall. Jared was paying debts by killing….and he was hired to kill the Terasaurs. The thoughts, the words echoed in her head…it wasn’t true…couldn’t be….but she had heard what he said! Her mind refused to believe it….”I’m sorry….so sorry…forgive me….Angel…no choice…” Jared’s words broke on a sob…he was crying in his sleep. Guilty men talked in their sleep….the words flickered through her mind, words her father had spoken in her youth.
Ser scrambled out of the room on hands and knees until she reached the stairs where she slid down, didn’t bother to stand, just leaned against the railing and pulled herself down until her bare feet hit the hardwood flooring of the entry way. She fumbled with the locks on the side kitchen door, finally managing to throw the dead bolt and open the door enough to slide out…she barely shut it before she took off running. Where would she go? She didn’t know…she just ran. It never occurred to her that it was still storming and she was outside in nothing but an oversized t-shirt that fell to her hips...nothing on below it. By time she reached the forest the shirt clung to her every curve, her hair lay in lank pieces around her face, feet were cut up and bleeding from the rocks, gravel, and even a piece of glass she’d stepped on but had ignored…she just kept running. The forest was dark, spooky…but Ser felt alive…her body trembling from more than just the cold and rain that fell down in blankets so thick she could barely see a foot in front of her as she moved. Her mind was whirling with the things he said…she knew his past…she never thought his future and the debts he’d be paying were those of a hit man…and he was to kill her family…her. The pain that shot through her was so raw and sharp that it brought her to her knees. Sticks snapped, leaves stuck to her body as she kneeled on the muddy ground, hands in front of her, body shaking. She panted, trying to stay in control…she couldn’t lose it…though she was having problems remembering why.
His words kept echoing over and over in her mind as her body twisted, contorted. She screamed. It echoed in the forest but a particularly loud crash of thunder drowned it out….disguised the sounds of her unwanted shifting from anything that could possibly hear her at the moment. She was utterly alone. Her body shook with force as bones reshaped themselves to something she’d never been…face contorted as she continued to scream…a muzzle grew…goo slid across her body and exploded outwards coating nearby plants and vegetation as coarse tan-ish blonde fur spread over her skin…a slightly darker color than her normal…she looked…like Jared did when he was a wolf. The snarl that over took her was canine as she fought the change, body elongated and shifting to yet another form. It was sleeker, thinner, bigger. Her fur receded then came back a lighter more platinum blond. She was lion. The stench of blood and other bodily fluids would be overwhelming as she lay panting on the ground, pain slicing through her abdomen causing the massive cat to hiss and mewl and roar. She’d lost the baby.
Some hours later she awoke…the sun had not yet begun to rise, and Jared’s face was close to her’s. “Angel?! What happened?! Why are you out here?” He knew…but he had to ask. He knew she had shifted. Ser’s white blue orbs widened, a look of sheer hatred and pain flickering through them as she scrambled away from him across the muddy leaf strewn grown. “Don’t. Touch. Me.” She muttered through clenched teeth when he reached for her again, worried, scared. “Baby…its me…what happened?” He asked softly as the scent of blood overtook his senses, her blood…it was the scent of the end of their child’s life. “You happened.” She snarled, causing him to wince, “You are nothing but a killer…a cold hearted murderer…how could you? A little girl…innocent people?” She screamed at him and ranted at him as he just stood there, each word she yelled acting like a precise hit to his stomach, his heart, his sanity. “I….didn’t have a choice…I owed debts...the girl...Oh God...Pakistan...” His voice was soft, sad,…regretful, she focused on the first part, ignored the last in her anger, “Debts?! DEBTS?! You killed innocent people to clear your fucking debts! And now…now you have to kill my family…me…..how could you agree to it?! I thought you loved me…” Her voice broke; the look on his face was utter confusion, “What are you talking about Angel?” He moved towards her, warily, the look in her normally white blue orbs now pure white scared him to his core….this wasn’t his Serenity. “I’m not your Angel! Don’t act like you don’t know…don’t lie to me! Get away from me….don’t touch me…no more….get out of here…get out of the Pride House…I don’t want anything to do with you ever again….if you come near me or my sisters…I’ll kill you myself before you kill them.” She snarled the words with such hate, such loathing that it cut through him, broke him. The look on his face, so forlorn…rejected…pain filled. It wormed it’s way into her heart, but she ignored it….her last words were what finished it all…”You are just like my Father…like Ulric….I hate you.” The words hung heavily between them as he stared at her, trembling on the muddy ground naked, coiled in a tight ball, knees to her chest. He left then…just…walked away…to where she’d never know. All she knew was that she began to cry, bawl, coiled into that sad little ball on the ground, shivering from the cold and rain. She stayed there for God knows how long and cried until there was nothing left…until Rhage found her and forced her home.
Ser wouldn’t talk, she made no noises, she just stayed curled up naked, dirty, wet on her bed, staring at the wall. Nothing her twin tried worked, a doctor came and went…most likely from the Master’s personal payroll…Rhage would have had to ask them for help. Ser refused to eat, to sleep, to talk…anything…she just…laid there…a statue, her grief filling the room. When it overcame her and became too much she shifted, first wolf then lion…then hours later would shift back…an endless cycle.